What happens when following Jesus starts feeling more like a performance than a relationship? In Episode 106 of *What the Hell Do I Know with JB*, I sit down with Monica Ritchie, author of *Fashioned by Faith*, to talk about spiritual formation, deconstruction, doubt, and the freedom to pursue Jesus without pretending we have everything figured out. For many of us, Christianity was handed down as a checklist. Pray more. Read more. Believe the right things. Don't ask too many questions. But what if becoming more like Jesus isn't about checking the right boxes? Monica and I explore what it means to move beyond performative Christianity and discover spiritual practices that actually shape how we live, love, and see others. We talk about: • Why God isn't surprised by our doubts, questions, or humanity • Deconstructing harmful expectations without abandoning Jesus • The difference between performing faith and embodying it • How to read difficult passages of Scripture with humility • Spiritual disciplines that create space for grace instead of guilt • Why every person deserves dignity as someone made in God's image • How to recognize God's goodness without denying real suffering • Why calling out harmful church practices can be an act of love One of my favorite reminders from this conversation is that we don't have to agree on every theological question to treat one another with dignity, kindness, and respect. If you're questioning the faith you inherited, struggling with religious expectations, or simply trying to become more like Jesus, I hope this conversation encourages you. 📖 **Monica's book: Fashioned by Faith** Find Monica's book wherever books are sold. Monica's instagram: @itsmonicaritchie 🎙️ **What the Hell Do I Know with JB** New conversations every Tuesday. Subscribe for honest conversations about faith, doubt, deconstruction, grace, and what it means to follow Jesus in a complicated world. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/_jason_becker/ YouTube: @whatthehelldoiknowjb Website: https://www.vintagewisdom.org/ If you're a believer, I hope I can stretch your definition of grace. If you're an unbeliever, I hope I can help you start doubting your unbelief. #FaithDeconstruction #MonicaRitchie #ChristianPodcast

What happens when the faith you were taught to trust becomes the very thing keeping you trapped? In Episode 105 of *What the Hell Do I Know with JB*, I sit down with Jubilee Dawn, creator and host of the **Healed-Ish** podcast, for an honest and sometimes heartbreaking conversation about religious trauma, spiritual manipulation, purity culture, abusive relationships, and the freedom to question everything you were taught. Jubilee grew up in evangelical Christianity, attended ministry school connected to Bethel, and eventually married a man she believed God had chosen for her through a prophetic word. But that marriage became abusive. And the theology she had inherited made leaving feel like disobeying God. We talk about what happens when forgiveness becomes an obligation, when fear of hell replaces love, and when religious certainty makes it almost impossible to recognize abuse. We also explore: • The influence of Bethel and charismatic Christianity • Purity culture and the shame it creates • How spiritual authority can enable manipulation • Why leaving an abusive marriage felt like sin • The fear of hell and the freedom to question it • LGBTQ+ inclusion and the harm of exclusionary theology • Deconstruction without pressure to arrive at someone else's conclusions • What churches can learn by actually listening to survivors One of my favorite parts of this conversation is Jubilee's reminder that healing doesn't have to happen on anyone else's timeline. You don't have to have all the answers. You don't have to know exactly what you believe tomorrow. And you certainly don't have to remain somewhere harmful to prove your faithfulness. Sometimes freedom begins with permission to ask a question. **CONNECT WITH JUBILEE DAWN** Instagram: @jublieedawns Podcast: Healed-Ish **CONNECT WITH JB** Instagram: @_jason_becker Website: https://www.vintagewisdom.org Subscribe to *What the Hell Do I Know with JB* for honest conversations about faith, doubt, deconstruction, grace, and following Jesus beyond the boundaries of institutional religion. **CONTENT NOTE:** This episode includes discussions of domestic violence, strangulation, childhood abuse, religious trauma, and spiritual manipulation. #ReligiousTrauma #JubileeDawn #FaithDeconstruction

This conversation was recorded several months before the passing of Jim Bakker on October 5, 2026. At the time, I had no idea that my conversation with his son, Jay Bakker, would carry this kind of weight when it was released. We talked about his father. His mother, Tammy Faye. The scandals, the pain, the complicated family relationships, and the kind of grace that doesn't require us to pretend those things never happened. One moment in particular has stayed with me. Jay recalled a conversation with his father about discovering a grace so radical that it almost seemed impossible to believe. His father's response? "We kind of thought it was too good to be true as well." In this episode of What the Hell Do I Know with JB, Jay and I explore what happens when grace becomes bigger than the religious systems we've built around it. As Jay puts it, "Grace is anarchy." We talk about growing up in one of America's most recognizable Christian families, the cost of affirming LGBTQ people, religious certainty, deconstruction, biblical interpretation, and what it means to keep following Jesus when so much of what you've inherited no longer makes sense. And we talk about forgiveness. Not the kind that erases harm or pretends everything was okay. But the kind that makes room for complicated people, complicated relationships, and the possibility of hope. With the recent passing of Jim Bakker, I want to be especially mindful that Jay and his family are grieving. This conversation was recorded long before his father's death, and Jay's reflections should be heard in that context. I'm grateful Jay trusted me with this conversation, and I'm grateful for his willingness to keep asking difficult questions while holding onto grace. **IN THIS EPISODE:** • Growing up as the son of Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker • Jay's relationship with his father and their different understandings of faith • A remarkable conversation between Jay and Jim about grace • Why Jay says "Grace is anarchy" • The personal cost of LGBTQ inclusion • Why defending Christianity isn't always the same as following Jesus • Faith, doubt, deconstruction, and biblical interpretation • Forgiveness without denying the past • What it means to remain a prisoner of hope **CONNECT WITH JAY BAKKER** Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jaybakker/ Revolution Church: https://revolutionchurch.com **CONNECT WITH JB** Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/_jason_becker/ Website: https://vintagewisdom.org If you're questioning faith but aren't ready to quit Jesus, this conversation is for you. Subscribe to What the Hell Do I Know with JB for honest conversations about faith, doubt, grace, church hurt, and finding our way forward. If you're a believer, I hope I can stretch your definition of grace. And if you're an unbeliever, I hope I can help you start doubting your unbelief. #JayBakker #JimBakker #RadicalGrace #FaithDeconstruction #WhatTheHellDoIKnow